1 definition by IamWD

Top Definition
A society for the intellectually pretentious. Not all Mensa members are pretentious egomaniacs, but... ok, yes we are. But, some of us aren't snobs.

Some people makes jokes about paying money to have an IQ test administered and then paying more money in annual dues just for the right to be in such an organization. I make those same jokes and I'm a member (It does make for good resume fluff and I will confirm that it has helped when my potential employers knew of the organization). The conversations are agonizing and the Mensa Bulletin (monthly magazine) runs a high probability of making your eyes bleed.

The best part about being a Mensa member is knowing someone with about 130 IQ and calling them "normie" (cute term for those with normal intelligence. Get it?! Ha...) and talking down to them.

Entrance to the organization requires a professionally administered IQ test with a result showing the taker to be in the top 2% of the population. For those without any previous qualifying tests, Mensa administers two tests ($30, which really isn't terribly bad for a professioanlly administered and graded test). A 98th percentile passing grade is only needed on one of the two tests. Scoring 99th percentile doesn't earn any kind of cool decoder ring, though, much to my dismay.

Mensa members are frequently found with useless degrees like an Ed.D. They do this to be called "doctor." It's easier to get an Ed.D. than it is to get a real doctorate, but it requires less "useful" knowledge, and no one will have to know!
Mensa is Latin for table. A three legged table doesn't wobble. An M has three "legs." See the connection? Eh? Neither do I. Round table society... "open-minded" discussions... yada yada yada.

The Simpsons episode about Mensa was flawed only by their letting Lisa in. Lisa is 7 years old and, therefore, too young to be a member. Mensa also doesn't just hand out free memberships! You'll get your free Mensa membership around the same time the Scientologists stop charging for whatever it is that they do.

"A guy walked into a bar with a lizard sitting on his shoulder. He said to the bartender, "A double whiskey for me and," pointing to the lizard, "a half-pint of Guiness for Tiny here."
"Why do you call him Tiny?" asked the bartender.
"Obviously," the man answered, "because he's my newt."
If you don't understand the joke, you have failed the admission test in advance. Please send me the $30 via Paypal and try again later.
by IamWD May 18, 2006

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