1. One who is of the douche
2. When an individual thinks they are funny when they are not.
3. Self absorbed idiot
4. Using old jokes and trying to convince others that he/she has a thread of originality.
5. Verbal diarrhea
6. A single middle age man who lives with his parents well past the age a grown man should be living with his parents.
7. Unable to provide for oneself
8. To get stuck working the bakery section of a grocery store.
"Poor old Matt, he only wanted to get a real job and move out someday, but he's bound to be a schantzel for a long lonely time."