A Bro; Socal Trash; Broseph, Dude-Bro, Bro
This species of usually white sometimes hispanic male can be found in consentrated herds in southern california. Areas in the "valley", Anywhere inbetween Barstow, Victorville, Apple Valley, San Dimas Covina/West Covina, Anahiem, San Bernadino, Fontana...etc
A dead giveaway that you have spotted a bro if you can smell the AXE body spray from the lifted Dodge/Ford next to you. They often refer to women as "Ho's" "B*tches" "cunts" "dick practice". Bro's also pride themselves in their "im such a dick!" attitude. It's kind of a way of setting themselvs apart from the rest of us who might actually have some respect for traffic laws, women, and the general public. Thats right, it's kind of hard to hold a conversation when the BRO next to you is blaring that annoying I hate everything especially my parents and my ex girlfriend music, or whatever music that makes them feel like such a "badass" and sound from his truck is shaking your car.
Bro's wear wonderfully matching clothes, it actually looks like their little sister wanted to play dress-up but whatever. Flat-Bill Caps, Wife-Beaters, those retarded looking skaters shoes that make it look like your feet are like 4 inches long, high black socks, Dickies pants or shorts, never less than 4 peircings, usually have facial hair (goatee, beard) the fat bro's dig the beard hides the fat face and gives them a more "look at me! i'm a hardcore biker lookin guy. Ya! im such a DICK!" Tattoos. shaved head or spiked hair all the way around, Clothing companies are always a dead giveaway, Hurley, Osiris, Etnies, Skin, SOCAL, RockStar, VolCom, Element, DC, DVS, Independent, West Coast Choppers, OC Choppers...etc. These companies are always plastered in stickers all over thier Bro-mobiles. Usually on the back window.
Bro lingo: "Dude", "Bro", "Dude-Bro", "Hey Bro", "Hey Brah", "Yo Bro", "Yo Brah", "Sup Bro", "Sup Brah", "You Hangout?"(a great pick up line), "Party?", "Sh!tfaced", "T-rashed", "D-G.A.F"(dont give a ****) "D!ck" "F*ck YOU BRO!" "F*ck OFF!", "Badass!", "SIIICK","Gnarly","Tight!"Fer-Sure Bro", "That sh!t was hella tight bro", "Pussy!"
How to protect yourself:
What I always do,
When one is spotted, be sure to alert your friends that your with. Yell at one friend "Dude!" and the other one confirms with a "Bro!" keep that going for about 30 seconds, it takes them awhile to catch on.
Bro's are hilarious. The Socal toughguy that will give you the finger(which he practices in the mirror before bed and when he is about to go out and cruise). Drives a big lifted truck with straight-piped exahust for that extra touch that lets you know he's coming and he's a dick. Cut's you off in traffic and gives you a long glance through his $20 sunglasses he purchased from Saleem at the 7-11. Revs his engine so your baby will start crying in the back seat. He laughs. Turns up his angry music, to let you know he had a bad day at school and he's pissed. as he is leaving the light he will probably take a chug of his Rockstar or his Monster Energy Drink, lick his toungue out between his two fingers and show you his toungue ring, letting you know he is a Dick, sexually expirenced and a badass, therefore you want him, or want to be like him. Bro 1: "Ya bro, he/she wants me" Bro 2: "Fer-sure brah". It doesnt matter if it's a guy, if he turns him on, thats bro points for him. Gay is kind of a flexible word these days.
Bro's usually never work, or if they do it's some pawn-ass job at a skate board shop, or changing oil at a Jiffy Lube. They always appear rich, but really, their clothes, trucks, and colonge are all purchased on a credit card that their parents gave them.
For some strange reason bro's have a strong female following. Probably because they "seem" dangerous and HOT!!!11one OMG sO HaWt!!!11one. But really, the whole adventureous badass sickass attitude is really just them being retarded, acting like 7 year olds on crank to hopefully earn the attention of a select "Hottie" or a "Big Bro" (a bro that they hang around with that is like the Main Bro, they all one day want to be as badass as this guy)He did 1 year at Citrus Community College.... Real men are Wild, dangerous, adventureous and fun guys.
Bro's, are posers, assholes and nut-sacks whose balls never dropped. They seem like everything out the outside, money, freedom, fun, but it's all a big shell. None of them actually know how to man up to a real situation or how to enjoy the presence of a decent young woman. "Hey, nice ass...b!tch" really doesnt cut it. Having fun to a Bro is getting wasted, and the rest he really doesnt matter. Mabey racing side-by-side down Glendora Mountain and trying to jump from another truck to another. Or getting drunk and trying to get cops attention by pulling up next to them and throwing beer cans at them trying to race all while giving them the finger and screaming D-G.A.F BRO!
So my point is, it's not the clothing that makes a bro, it's the fake attitude, of this hardcore hardass who wears only black and white and acts like he is invincible. See, bro's wear skater clothes, how many of them actually skate? You arent a bro for wearing hurley or Dc Shoe.
"Look at those trucks in that parking lot and all the people out next to them, Thats what we like to call a brodeo, it's when they meet a location or "local" if your too bro to speak normal english. And they take their underage girlfriends and drive around from their location for about an hour and then drive back up to the hills to have a party which ends up in some type of guy-guy, girl-girl, guy-guy-girl sex. just a brodeo, happens all the time."
"Wow that guy is Bro'd out"
"If their an AXE factory in this mall?, nah, it was just that dude-bro that walked by"
"Look at that bro who parked his brodozer parked sideways in that parking lot taking up 4 spaces"
"F*cks up bro, tryin' to get faded?"
"We got so T-rashed last night in the desert, ya me to brah, I got head like 6 times and once when I was chugging a bottle of Vodka, god im so f*ucking cool!"