5 definitions by HardLard

Top Definition
A five year old child characterized by sloth, powerful jaw muscles and the ability to put away large portions of cooked vegetables in one sitting.
Where did all the canned corn go? The Nichopotamus wouldn't eat anything else for dinner but eventually he'll be six so lighten up.
by HardLard February 12, 2010
Preferring to work alone, this creature is quite hilarious despite the lack of trying. Typically oblivious to its surroundings, the beast should be left to immerse itself in whatever the chosen activity; calling attention to it is highly dangerous and similar to waking a sleepwalker.
Don't bother the Russelluphagus until he's done drawing noses on all the Potatoes.
by HardLard February 12, 2010
A team of two or more guys who, when asked questions either general or specific about those facets of an operation they are entrusted with, respond with snarky comments and poor temperament. Basically they'd rather take every opportunity to crack wise than help get the materials out the door so we can get back to our fucking desks and answer the damned phone.
"Dickpatch, line four!"
by HardLard February 10, 2010
An area of a store characterized by numerous adjacent white vinyl tiles and populated by salesmen who can't get it through their thick heads that the out-of-town trucks are full and no, we can't add that shit to the load. The sanitary state the term implies is stained by the impetuous nature of its denizens.
Where does Matt get off? It's 4:00 and he's got I-Joists for Livingston... I wish he'd stay on the whitefloor and leave us the fuck alone.
by HardLard February 12, 2010
The lingering liquid that remains in the recessed rim of a canned beverage after drinking from it. The presence of spimp makes it generally undesirable to share the beverage with somebody else especially being the second to drink from the can.
Damn, I'm thirsty but didn't you have sex with that Karen chick last week? I heard she has Herpes. You can keep the spimp, I'm heading to the snack shack.
by HardLard February 12, 2010

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