A vagina which is so ancient that it needs a team of anthropologists to recognise it.
Your Grandma: "Look at my vaginasaurus!"
A would-be brother-in-law who is in a commited relationship with your sister but isn't legally married to her.
These relatives are awkward to introduce because they're not necessarily your friends, but technically not your relatives either. You don't want to insult him by going into detail about his relationship with your sister in public, but if you call him your brother-in-law, awkwardness might arise when people glance at the non-existent wedding ring.
This also applies to would-be parents and sisters-in-law.
Jack: Hey Ted, why don't you invite your brother-in-theory onto our softball team?
Ted: Are you kidding? Then my father-in-theory's gonna want to join too. There's a reason I didn't marry into that crazy family, ya know.
50's slang for something particularly funny or amusing.
Joanne: Davie and I were parked up at Lovers' Point in the backseat of his bent eight last Thursd'y night when he unzipped his fly and rolled out what looked like a stack of quarters! Golly gosh, I didn't stop laughing till he dropped me off at my folks' place!
Margerie: Wow, sounds like a real big tickle!
African heritage. Rather than referring to your African-American-or-whatever background, simply refer to your Blackground.
That way, you have more time to wear weaves and adopt stereotypical black catch phrases.
Norman: Nice two-foot afro you have there, ma'am. I'm assuming you have a blackground.
Yolanda: Cracka whaaaat?!
Another word for 'pain-addict' or 'masochist'.
Ouch-aholic: "STOMP ON MY BALLS!! NOW!!"
OCD: Orange County Disorder.
A severe behavioural disorder which swept the globe between 2003 - 2007, during which the Fox network aired "the O.C.", a glamorous teen drama centred around a group of self-centred teens.
Symptoms of OCD include: Nervous breakdowns while waiting for new episodes; inability to sleep without hearing a witty quip from Seth or a dumb-brunette catch-phrase from Summer; shouting things out during sleep such as "No! Don't punch him, Ryan! They'll send you back to juvi!" or "Put your damn bagels away, Sandy, nobody likes them!!".
Signs of the disorder include: Long, flowery dresses and excessive beaded necklaces, in imitation of Mischa Barton's fashion; a spray-on, orangey complexion; mass-consumption of bagels; the tendency to break off a relationship due to something frustratingly trivial such as an overdue term paper or a broken nail.
Kelli: And THEN Kirsten had to go to rehab, but she didn't want to, but they made her, and then she was all "oh ok, I'll go to rehab" but then Marissa was all "BANG BANG BANG!" and then Trey was all..
Cashier: Ma'am, I don't know who or care who this Melissa character is. Please pay for your magazines so I can carry on with my depressing life.
Bystander: Looks like a serious case of OCD.. Tsk tsk tsk..