13 definitions by Global Feetus

Top Definition
1.NYC Deli slang for the act coating a bagel with a small amount of cream cheese.
2. A small amount of any condiment applied to a food item.
3. A medical test for women from New York.
1. "Hey Marty a poppy seed with a schmear ." (NOTE:To use schmear authentically the customer usually mumbles while he waits just loud enough for other customers to hear something like: "Oy is so hot in here , I should be so rich to pay this electric bill. How does he make a living? Such a waste.")
2. Klutz...I said a schmear of mustard...not the whole jar."
2. I am so verklempt my doctor wants me to get another pap schmear. I should live that long!"
by Global Feetus April 03, 2007
1. A nautical Expression. Pack Sand originates from the onerous task of filling (or refilling existing) sands bags used for ballast. On sailing ships "sand packing" was done in the bilges. In the days of sail the bilges contained all types of wastes including but limited to fecal material, dead animals and other effluents. Also see pound sand

2. A seafaring insult. When one was told to "pack sand" it was considered a huge insult often resulting in a heated exchange of salty language.Also see pound sand
1. "Bosun Jones tell Seaman Jones to lay below for the sand packing detail."

2"Arrrgh pack sand mate..wait yer turn like ye others." Typical Response: Arr go f@3$% yerself you c@!*%&& b$5#2! son of a whore. "
by Global Feetus April 03, 2007
A person spontaneously and anonymously who defecates in public areas. The areas are chosen for the greatest visual and olfactory effect upon the observer, for example:

1. Water fountains
2. Public Pools and the Beach
3. Dressing Rooms.
4. Ex girlfriends mailbox.

Also see Poop Phantom
1. " Mommy I want a drink of...WHAAAAAAAAAAA...the phantom pooper...WHAAAAAAAAA! "

2. "Great day for a swim...what's that floating by your face? OMG! " The Phantom Pooper had struck again.

3. " Don't these pants look great...whats that smell?"

4. " Phantom pooper? Listen lady I don't care why your bill is late...just pay it.
by Global Feetus April 03, 2007
An cautionary expression used in the USMC."Rip off your head and shit down your windpipe" gently warns the listener " Please pay attention, I'm not joking here. Thank you for you consideration."
1."Dammit, Dave I'm gonna rip off your head and shit down your windpipe if your try to go out with my sister!

2. "Your going to force me to rip off your head and shit down your windpipe if you insist on breaking in line."

3. "QUIT EYEBALLING ME BOY. I'm gonna rip off your head and shit down your windpipe if you don't get some polish on those boots."
by Global Feetus March 27, 2007
Slang for Titusville Florida. pr: Tight-ass-ville.

Refers to the uptight anal retentive city council, the reactionary politics and the 2 to 1 ratio of Baptist Churches to citizens (in the city). There are so many churches that parishoners often attend services in up to three separate churches, going from church to church each Sunday just to keep them all open.
1. Dave sighed;"You cant throw a dead cat in Tightassville without hitting a damn Baptist Church."

2. "The Tightassville City Council voted to prohibit slavery today. Lincoln would be proud."

3. "The Tightassville city council passed the Defense of Marriage act prohibiting gay marriage. Now they are working on the brother-sister wording for the amendment"
by Global Feetus April 03, 2007
1.The appearance of a person who is extremely hungover or in the process of getting shit faced.

2 A POS Honda with cracked nose fairings and a huge spoiler, both painted in gray primer.

3. Anything unsightly or particularly ugly.

1."Christ, Dave you look like hammered dogshit."

2.Dude you call that a ride? It looks like hammered dogshit!

3. After he totaled his dads car his face looked like hammered dogshit.
by Global Feetus March 26, 2007
Unintentional misspelling of Titusville Florida on mail addresses , order and address forms and in newspapers. See Tightassville. Considered "naughty."
1. Phone Order clerk:" I want to confirm that address again. You want that delivered to 104 Oak Street in Titsville ( teheheh) Florida 32783? Right? (teheheh)
Female Customer: " (sigh)No, No..that's Titusville....
Phone Order clerk: "Oh..It looked like Titsville!"
Female Customer: "Gee I've never heard that before. Listen pervert, congratulations you said "tits" to a customer. Now can we finish order...do you want my credit card number or my bra size?"
by Global Feetus April 03, 2007

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