A piff an unexpected splirt of white gas out of the top of your penis. It makes a loud PIFF sound and comes out nice and slowly. You may not feel it coming out but you sure will hear it.
In normals terms a piff is a penis-fart.
Person 1: Hey man do you want to see a movie?
Person 2: Yeah dude what movie are ou *PIFF* t.
Person 1: Gross. Did you just piff?
Willy Wonka is a low-life, messed up individual who stays in his home for years on end figuring out ways to lure children into his "factory" and help them live there forever with him and his Oompa sex slaves. On one occassion he sent out 5 gold tickets to random children. Two of which were girls so he sent them home right away. One who was a little on the chubby side and knew it be hard to drag him around on his sex leash. The two last ones were perfect. Small and innocent. He smothered one because he was annoying and kidnapped the other named Charlie due to him being poor and nobody cared about him. Willy Wonka should die but nobody does anything about him because when he is done with the children he makes delicious candy out of them.
Kid 1: Hey did you get a Gold Ticket for Willy Wonka this year?
Kid 2: No, I did last year though.
Kid 1: HOW WAS IT?
Kid 2: Let's just say I couldn't walk afterwards and my butt hurt a lot.
Kid 1: I know I can't wait.... wait what?