69 definitions by George McBob

A computer system with the main function of keeping you away from your own data or any information that is in any way remotely useful or entertaining.

It is presided over by a deranged creature with a god complex and no social skills known as a sysadmin.
Dilbert: Server's down!
Alice: Hold me!
by George McBob May 21, 2009

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After the ANC, Telkom is South Africa's largest crime syndicate.

Their modus operandi is to force other companies into selling their products for them under duress, extort ungodly fees out of their customers, particularly on ADSL lines, with broadband prices 10 times or more than overseas, and up to 100 times more on leased lines.

They resort to thuggery and intimidation such as sending technicians to disconnect you for no reason, charging you for non-existent calls and unexplained tariffs and staffing their call centres with retarded unionised sociopaths.

Their main partners in crime are Eskom and Sasol.
It's a proven fact that if you fly 1st class to Hong Kong, stay in a 5 star hotel, buy a laptop, download 100GB onto it and fly back, it will be both QUICKER and CHEAPER than if you stayed in SA and downloaded it on a Telkom line.
by George McBob May 21, 2009

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The horrible tangled mass of hair, soap scum and bodily fluids that clogs the plughole of a bath or shower.

Usually caused by women who wash their hair, shave their legs and armpits or trim their pubic hair in the shower.

If not dealt with in their early stages, they will grow, block the pipes, float around in a pool of water that spills onto the bathroom floor. and produce a clan of sentient offspring that attack you in the dead of night and drag you off into the sewers.
It takes a brave man to remove a bathroom wookiee.
by George McBob May 19, 2009

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A Zeroeth Law is a law that is added to another set of laws at a later date.

It is usually so important that the other laws cannot function without it, yet so obvious that nobody thought it needed stating.
The Zeroeth Law of thermodynamics: If objects B and C are both in thermal equilibrium with object A, then they are in thermal equilibrium with each other.

Isaac Asimov's Zeroth Law of Robotics: A robot may not harm humanity, or through inaction allow humanity to come to harm.

Newton's Zeroeth Law of Motion: If objects A and B are moving relative to object C at velocities v1 and v2, then they are moving relative to each other at velocity v3 which is the difference between v1 and v2. (Note: This law is now known not to be true, especially near the speed of light. That's where Einstein comes in)

The Zeroeth Commandment: Thou Shalt believe all of this and never question what thou art told.
by George McBob June 21, 2009

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S. Afr. word for pickup truck. Pronounced "bucky"

The bakkie holds the same place in the heart and soul of the South African dutchman as the pickup does in that of the American redneck.
Koos will bring a braai and some fishing tackle in his bakkie.
by George McBob May 18, 2009

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Fart, flatulate, break wind, pass gas.

It comes from the Blackadder episode "Beer"
(Lord Melchett has a hangover, but Queen and Nursie think he's sick)
Queen: Well, hurry up and cure the horrible man -- I'm fed up with him lying there moaning and groaning...
Nursie: ...and letting off such great and fruitsome flabby woof-woofs! One can scarcely believe one's tiny nosy!
by George McBob May 12, 2009

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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An extreme sport popular in Soweto, South Africa.

It includes things like hanging onto a moving train and sliding your feet on the platform, standing on the roof and dodging powerlines, jumping on and off repeatedly, jumping from a bridge onto a moving train and jumping between carriages. The more dangerous the stunt, the better.

It is illegal, and fatalities are common
Sipho and Themba went train surfing from Dobsonville to Orlando.
by George McBob May 05, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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