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2 definitions by Gaming Veteran

 
1.
A console made by Nintendo hated by Sony fanboys for "making games geared for children" and having "dated hardware" which is utter bullshit. While the PSP (Sony's handheld) has many features that the DS doesn't have (but can be added through accessories), they are all bullshit you don't need. Everyone already owns a MP3 player that actually fits in our pockets, why the fuck would we want a bigger one? The UMD format used for watching movies is dead, so good luck with that. The Nintendo DS has a big library of cool games, where you can kill zombies, solve murder cases, play Sudoku, play great RPG's, and so much more. The graphics are mainly 2D, but the DS can do last wave N64-like 3D too.

The PSP also has good games, even though Nintendo fanboys say otherwise, and if the price wasn't so steep, it would match the DS. The graphics of the PSP are shitty 3D, last wave PS1 to first wave PS2, and has many defects (flying UMD's, disk read errors, short battery life, no refunds for a screen with dead pixels etc etc., but it seems the newer shipments have less of these defects), and is still being raped in sales by the DS Lite.

The PSP is a good purchase if you have the money, because of the many good original games, but if you want to make the most out of your money, the DS Lite is what you want. If you have the money I recommend both.
Nintendo fanboy: The PSP has no games!! IN YOUR FACE LOLOL, THE NINTENDO DS WINS BECAUSE OF GAMES! DS DS DS

Me: Shut up idiot, the PSP does have great games on it, too bad there are so many rehashes of old games on it, but the original games rock.

Sony fanboy: Look! I can play MP3's, watch movies, and browse the internet! LOL

Me: I thought you had a MP3 player and computer for that? Dumbass. The UMD format is dead, so say bye to your movies. Good luck finding wireless access points to connect to the internet. Idiot.
by Gaming Veteran December 26, 2006
 
2.
PSP
A handheld system made by Sony. Competing with the Nintendo DS. The PSP has all the shit you just don't need or already have, like playing MP3's, browsing the internet, watching movies, and viewing images. To watch the movies you must buy them in a specific format (UMD) for your PSP, so if you already own a movie on DVD and you'd like to watch it on the go, you are shit out of luck. The UMD format is considered dead nowadays, so good luck getting the latest movies on your PSP. To browse the internet, you must be near a wireless access point, places such as Mac Donalds have these, but if you are on a bus/train, or in a car (not driving of course), you are once again, shit out of luck. The included memory stick holds like 5 MP3's, so unless you buy a bigger memory stick, you are shit out of luck. Not to mention you'd look like a fucking geek with a case with the PSP hanging on your belt, so if you want to listen music without having your hands occupied, you are shit out of luck. Combine that with the fact that the PSP's demographic most likely owns a MP3 player already, so that's another feature rendered useless. The retail price is already pretty steep, and if you want to draw it's full potential, you will spend even more. The DS gives you the option to do all that (except playing movies) with third party accesories. That's right, the OPTION.

Next, the games. They don't suck as much as Nintendo fan boys say, but half of the worthy games are PS1/PS2 rehashes, so you basically pay a premium to play old games on a smaller screen and with worse graphics, but this time, it's portable. Whoop-de-fucking-doo. Also the gameplay is crippled by the lack of a 2nd analog stick. The original worthy PSP titles are actually pretty good. MGS:PO and Loco Roco for example.

The DS has a ton of good games going for it, and in contrary to what Sony bots spam, they aren't kiddy at all. Phoenix Wright is a splendid game, and Mario & Luigi: PiT is hilarious, with some jokes meant for the mature gamers too. The DS also captures the whole non-gamer market, and is selling 300k weekly in Japan, 10x more than the PSP, but of course people reading this probably don't care about that. Metroid Prime hunters is elite, and Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow? Rocks crotches. The DS also offers full backwards compatibility with the GBA games, so if you didn't get a GBA, you've got a huge selection of games.

Next, the looks. The PSP blew the original DS out of the water on that department, but the tables have turned with the release of the DS Lite, which is gorgeous. The DS also counters screen scratches by protecting both screens when it's closed. The same thing can't be said for the PSP. The PSP also had tons of defects at it's birth, and Sony refused to replace screens with a few dead pixels. The DS too had some dead pixels, but Nintendo offered free and prompt replacements.

Next, the graphics. Yes, the PSP has better graphics than the DS, there is no denying it. HOWEVER, I prefer good 2D, rather than shitty 3D, but that's a matter of taste.

Final verdict:
The PSP is generally made for bragging to your friends, but it does have a few must-have games that are really good. Disappointing because it pushes features that you don't need, and has a dead proprietary format, all of which you pay for.

The DS doesn't have cutting edge graphics, but the sheer amount of killer apps, the beauty of the DS Lite, and a cheap price more than make up for it.
Dumbass: MYN PSP CEN PLAY MP3, MOVIES, BROUSE TEH INTARWEB, END I CEN PLAY GTA: ANOTHER REHASH ON IT! LOLOLOL

Bob: I've had a MP3 player for years, and never in my fucking life have I wished I could browse the internet in a few select places with wireless access points, as for movies, the UMD format is dead dipshit. How does it feel to have burned 400$ on the PSP, and all accessories required to do all those supercool features you mention? Dumbass.

Dumbass: BUT LOOK AT THOSE GRAPHICS!!!!!!! LOOOOOOOOOOOL

Bob: Whatever man, I'm gonna kill zombies, shoot some fools online, and solve a murder case with Castlevania, Metroid Prime, and Phoenix Wright on my DS, eat shit and die loser.

James: Aww Bob weren't you too harsh on that dumbass? I mean the PSP does have some great games on it.

Bob: You are right, I'd buy the PSP if I didn't have to pay for stupid features I don't need.
by Gaming Veteran December 25, 2006