4 definitions by GabrielDertzer

Top Definition
Often seen in in play by female receptionists when a man arrives at the desk and towers above her for no apparent reason.

She deftly places the palm of her hand on her chin and her elbow on the desk neatly blocking all attempts to 'View the Valley' with the strategicaly placed forearm.

It is a position that can be strongly defended for hours especially when used in conjunction with a swivel chair.

Not to be confused with:
The Cleavage Offence.
Guy 1: "Aww, Maaan! Have you seen the new girl on reception? The most amazing frontage you ever man!!"
Guy 2: "Jeez! No dude. She totally flawed me with The Cleavage Defence."
Guy 1: "Yeah, she's a professional man."
by GabrielDertzer September 28, 2010

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Often seen in in play by female receptionists when a man arrives at the desk with the intention of engaging in an appropriate and innocent busness-like interaction.

She exaggeratedy places the palm of her hand on her chin and her elbow on the desk blatantly drawing attention to the act of her covering her cleavage from view with her forearm.

Frequently accompanied by chewing or staring with a raised eyebrow and one side of the mouth curled up in dusgust.

Usually carried out by insecure harpies with skin like the armpit on a Hell's Angel's beaten leather jacket.

Not to be confused with:
The Cleavage Defence.
Justin: "Hi, I'm here to see. . .errr"
Receptionist: Chew, chew, chew, 'siiiiighhhhhh. . .'
Justin: ". . . err, your CEO. I'm errr, a VP at Intel Labs."
Receptionist: "Have a seat then. 'Sigh'. . . "
Joseph: "Haha Justin, you just got totally busted checking out her rack!"
Justin: "No way man! She totally wrong-footed me with The Cleavage offence. No really. She so did dude!!"
Joseph: "Phhhttt. Sure. whatever."
by GabrielDertzer September 28, 2010

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Bel-lend-eeum Noun.
1. A substence that emits a life draining force akin to the effect Kryptonite has on Superman only this affects normal reasonably intellignt people. It is invisible and odourless but often accompanies chavs, knackers, and skangers.

2. Smegma Polite. Aka Coquefort, Helmetdale.
1.
"I think it was the presence of the chihuahua wearing a Burberry jacket that tipped me off to the likelihood of high levels of Bellendium at that teenage party on Saturday. We managed to escape without having drank any alco-pops, hearing anyone say InitDough?, or seeing kids holding their hands up like they've got arthritis or cramp!"

2. After realising she'd sat through almost two hours of argument about Arsenal and Manchester United between two ugly fat blokes, it suddenly dawned on Charlotte that she'd been subjected to an incredibly strong source of Bellendium in the room.

3.

Marie: "Hey Julie, has your young Brian got an overly ripe wedge of Tallegio in his jeans pocket?
Julie: "No. The Bellendium is strong with this one."
by GabrielDertzer September 28, 2010

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Any technology-based Apple products like the iphone.
Hey look at my new ipad,
Dude, you're really into your thicknology.

You're a real thicknophobe dude.
That's because I'm a system administrator.

I've just got a new iphone to go with my mac, nano, and ipad.
Wow, you're a real thickie.

I run the new media design team at work.
You thicknocrat
by GabrielDertzer September 27, 2010

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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