1 definition by FailEpicly

Top Definition
Riku (n) (adj) (v)

1) (n) Those who think they are 'super-special-awesome'; those who attempt to be 'emo'; A rare illness that results in loss of hetero, (Rikuitis); a pokemon

2) (adj) Lacking hetero and in denial; unsightly douche-ness

3) (v) The act of douching; the act of stealing puppets; the act of attempting to stab former best friends heart with key; bro rape.


If you spot a 'Riku', someone being 'Riku', or someone 'Rikuing', exercise extreme caution. Rikus are characterized by being egotistical, carrying around large key rings that they try to attack with, and love underage girls and little boys. The latter being hidden by an attempt to seem 'Alpha-male'.

Those with Rikuitis should be avoided. Should you meet someone suffering from Rikuitis, make sure you are able to call to assistance a young boy of questionable sexual orientation, a mutant dog, and a duck with a hat. They are a proven cure for Rikuitis in mild cases, and can protect you from getting it. However, be warned, being around them for too long will result in mental retardation. If you happen to be around someone with Rikuitis without protection, and are male, you are at risk for bro rape. Girls cannot get Rikuitis, but may suffer loss of brain cells from being near those with it.

If you are to come across someone 'Rikuing,' call for help. Rikuing is dangerous and may result in AIDS and several unknown STDs as well as the loss of puppets and/or things resembling puppets. You may also contract Rikuitis, if male, or lose sanity, if female. Exercise the use of knives in this situation, though, if they are carrying key rings do not attack. While they can't hurt you, they may hurt themselves.
1) Girl #1: Hey look! A Wild Riku! *throws pokeball*
Wild Riku: *sulks in corner*
Boy #1: Pssh, I can do that better! *sulks 'better'*
Girl #2: Damn it, we already have to deal with one Riku, we don't need another one!

2) Girl #1: He was such a Riku yesterday! I swear he lost his hetero, but he denies it. But I even caught him looking at a younger girl!
Girl #2: That douche.

3) Boy #1: It was horrible, Jimmy starting Rikuing!
Boy #2: Damn, you didn't get bro raped did you?
Boy #1: No, but he went after my litter brother and sister.
Boy #2: You should take 'em to a hospital quickly, I'll find help for Jimmy. We need to stop him before he buys useless and random keys!
by FailEpicly April 03, 2009

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