1. One of the best Universities in the West, and the first and best university in the state of Utah. An institution with a rich academic heritage, including the first implanted artificial heart, and the first dialysis machine, as well as the home of Nobel Prize winning faculty.
2. The school Mormons choose to go to when they want to receive a REAL education.
Also known as the U, or the U of U.
Thank goodness you got accepted to the University of Utah and chose to go there instead of going to the school in Provo, where you might have had to settle for a wife and kids and a degree instead of a REAL education.