When a person can't have things the way they want so they use power and control to try to coerce their partner into doing something they don't want to (also known as hyper control). Usually, women are not abusive, but they can become abusive because of prior abuse as a Coping method. Sometimes people ask why does a women go back to an abusive husband, one reason is because the prior abuse they received for so long has made them feel like it is normal to be abused.
Police come out to a "Domestic Abuse" calling because a man has just threw a remote at his wife after punching the wall. This would be considered abuse even if the remote was not thrown because punching the wall was done by the man to scare her into doing something she might not want to do. He also did this to scare her into doing something she might not want to do