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12 definitions by Elburno

 
1.
Expression used to describe vigourous acts of masturbation with no regard for possible reprecussions such as friction burns or wanker's cramp.
Shlonglinator: I've got an awful horn. Think I'm going to head home and beat my cock like a ginger stepchild

Lads: You mean meeting gemma......
by Elburno September 20, 2009
 
2.
The art of never getting up off your hole and doing things.
Enda indulges in excessive amounts of procrastination as well as masturbation.
by Elburno February 24, 2008
 
3.
A way of emphasising when a woman is increidbly attractive as cheesy doritos not only leave crumbs but also stink up the place.
Jessica Alba you wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating cheesy doritos
by Elburno January 27, 2008
 
4.
Expression used by bar staff to describe a a beer tap for a product that is no longer in stock and has been so for an extended period. Generally the product in question will never be stocked again so it is only due to the idiotcy of management that the tap remains in place.
Customer: I'll have a pint of Becks.
Exasperated barman: Sorry but we've no Becks on draught.
Customer: But there's a tap there.
Increasingly irate barman: That tap is like a Eunuch's cock. I can pull at it all day and nothing's going to comeout.
by Elburno February 18, 2008
 
5.
Masturbating 11 times a day while sponging off society.
We all started wanking like peter on the dole when we saw the bottle of midleton.

it was like john just grew a badonkadonk.
by elburno March 08, 2008
 
6.
A person of sub par intelligence, to the extent that you have to assume they are merely a non-hominoid simian who has somehow aquired a human shaped, halloween costume.
Paris Hilton is a monkey in a person suit. Hell you can see the zip.
by Elburno October 03, 2011
 
7.
After using a urinal you're permitted to remove any excess urine off by shaking your cock twice. Three times you're just having a wank.
It's occasionally difficult to tell if people are simply ignorant of the three shake rule or if half the population of galway are chronic masturbators.
by Elburno February 21, 2008