A person who is only there for you when convenient. Not a real dad. He tends to read books about raising your children, hoping to get all answers from them. This tends to result in him believing that all teenagers are druggies, or on steroids, and that all girls are bound to end up having unprotected sex by the time they're 16.
Any man can be a father. I takes a real man to be a dad.
Color Guard; the people with flags in Marching band
"Look at me! I'm a flaggot! -twirls flag- ... Ya know, the people who wanted to get into marching band but couldn't because they couldn't really march or play an instrument. So they dance around with flags instead."