3 definitions by Dismal Pole69

Top Definition
Cactus Cock, or Cactoid Dong Disorder(CDD), is no joke and should be taken seriously by all. If you have developed a case of Desert Dick, and proceed to masturbate (beat the hell out of your dong) you will be hit with a case of Cactus Cock. Signs include, but are not limited to: Yellow penis and dick head, menstrual like discharge from the urethra on a weekly basis, an odor more powerful than swass or swalls, and dry mouth...
There is no known cure for the Cactoid Dong Disorder.
Guy 1: "Aw man! can you smell that? It smells like someone puked in a sweaty ass and then fucked it!"
Guy 2: "Hey! come on man, have some sympathy, I've got Cactus Cock and now my dick smells like shit!"
by Dismal Pole69 August 26, 2009
Desert Dick, or DDS (Desert Dick Syndrome) is a very serious illness that occurs in sexually active males. The male dick end, or knob, becomes red, dry and itchy, like the desert, somtimes the skin cracks and bleeding can occur. Its history is very unclear... The first case discovered was among the nates of the peguis first nation. Indian folklore tells of a young boy, by the name of Randy, stumbling into the forests of the Peguis first nation after huffing a large amount of gas.. He was then forced give anal sex to a big bear by the name of Terry. Randy then returned home and slept for two days without washing his penis. A terrible case of Desert Dick Syndrome (DDS) was the result. Masturbating with DDS can cause a very serious Illness called Cactus Cock.
Guy: "No baby, we cant have sex tonight"
Girl: "Why's that baby? You cant get a hard-on?"
Guy: " I havent showered since we last fucked, so now i've got the goddamned Desert Dick..."
Girl: "My god! that looks like the Sahara! Fuck!"
by Dismal Pole69 August 26, 2009
A small thin homosexual male whom is only attracted to older, dominant Aboriginal males. They are usually extremely pale of skin and have a prepubescent cracking to their voice. Groobers are very proud individuals, and often showcase their pride by shouting "FUCK YOU! I'M GROOBER!"
Person 1: "Wow that guy totally has that nate dog's dick in his mouth!"
Person 2: "Oh man he's so skinny and pale, what a homo bitch!"

Person 1: " He's totally a Groober!"

Person 2: " I agree, his voice is cracking like a 12 year old."
by Dismal Pole69 August 26, 2009

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