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1 definition by Dan'

 
1.
Teletard is a word originating from the highly popular chat website, Habbo Hotel. It is used to define a specific group of people who tend to act, or dress their avatar, in a specific way.

Originally, while myself and Scott were standing in the room GOTHIC HOUSE, (The room is supposed to have a Gothic theme. Do not mistake me for some loser.) we were blocking the entrance to the room for kicks. A second entrance to the room is available through a teleporter, which we also stood in front of to prevent entry into the room.

While there, some kids used the teleporter and started insulting the two of us. I said something stupid, along the lines of "Teleporter retards." and Scott replied with, "Teletards!"

Thus it was done. We now recognise a lot of people as Teletards, and have gone as far as to give the classification six sub-genres.

First off, I would like you to understand that the original teletards were recognised by their use of the smiley ":|" which was their constant reply to anything we said that disagreed with them. These people lacked the intelligence to debate with us, and thus had to resort to a two-character smiley. Anyone who uses this smiley will be automatically considered a Teletard.

Here are the Teletard Sub-Genres;

Classification #1: Someone who dresses their avatar colourfully.

Classification #2: Someone who uses extremely pale skin for their avatar.

Classification #3: Someone who finger-fucks their shift key. Thus typing with a capital letter for the beginning of each word.

Classification #4: The people that think adding !!11one!1omgwtfbbq!1 to the end of an exclaimed sentence is the cool and 'leet' thing to do.

Classification #5: Those who abuse punctuation, or go over the top when using Internet acronyms.

Classification #6: A combination of two or more of the above classifications.

Though I would like to again make a point of the fact that the classifications are useless unless the accused has actually used the ":|" or ";|" smiley. Or at least seems like they would.

-EXAMPLES-

Dan': Teleporter retards.
Scott: TELETARDS!
Dan': TELETARDS
Dan': TELETARDS
Dan': TELETARDS
Dan': TELETARDS
Scott: TELETARDS
Scott: TELETARDS
Scott: TELETARDS
Scott: TELETARDS

--

Dan': Get out of my room.
Teletard Classification #1/2: n00b ;|

--

Scott: Get off my hotel.
Teletard Classification #3: Its Not Your Hotel :|

--

Dan': Shut the fuck up.
Teletard Classification #4: :| ... you shut up!11!1!oneoneomg!11wtfbbq!

--

Teletard Classification #5: ;|
Dan': Fuck off.
Scott: You bell'ead.
Teletard Classification #5: LMFAOOOOOOOOOOO

--

Teletard Classification #6: :| You Are Such A Noob
Dan': Get fucked, cock-whore.
Scott: You cuntblaster.
Teletard Classification #6: LMFAOOOOOOOOOO
Dan': Don't rape my language, you treasonous fuck. Get off my Hotel.
Teletard Classification #6: What Eva I Cnt Be Bovad With Yoo Anymore *Leaves*
Scott&Dan': 1-0 :)
by Dan' August 25, 2006
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