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65 definitions by Cunty Fresh Fanatic

 
15.
Any bullshitter claiming to be involved in a company, corporation, partnership, et cetera and/or claiming to be an investor in stocks, commodities, bonds, et cetera. Usually used to bed a woman, but also to get inept and submissive people to bow to them.
loser: Yeah I'm looking everyday, for something new to invest my money in.

Me: Oh, you day-trade?

loser: No. I have my money in a mutual fund. I was looking to invest my money in a restaurant franchise. Me and my wife are going to look at property today.

winner: That'll be around a million for high traffic real estate, a million to purchase a franchise, plus your going to have to ante up to whomever owns any exclusivity rights, plus you have to...

loser: It shouldn't be that much. My friend that makes mad money, selling time shares, he found me the property.

Me: Mad money?

loser: Like thirty grand a month in the summer.

Me: Sounds like your impoverished friend is a bit of a bullshitnessman, such as yourself.

loser's wife: Come to think of it, you haven't done thing business-wise since I've known you. That's why I have a hard time getting wet for you.
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic May 31, 2011
 
16.
The shocking phenomenon, in which the slightest pressure upon an unaroused man's testicles causes pain. Yet during sexual arousal, the testicles can take repetitive strikes painlessly and/or pleasurably.
Woman strikes man with pillow in balls. He falls to ground in fetal position moaning in agony.

Woman feels bad, decides to break him a piece of ass. He fucks all three hole's like a human jackhammer, all night long.

Woman experienced the testicle paradox.
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic November 08, 2010
 
17.
The best kept secret of clean crotched women across the globe. A heavy duty povidone-iodine douche. Basically, the last over-the-counter resort women have.
woman 1: If it wasn't for vagi-gard, I would have been in the ER for sure.

woman 2: Thank heavens. Want to scissor with that extra clean bearded clam of yours?

(Scissoring ensues. Without a funky mess mind you.)
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic February 10, 2012
 
18.
When two lesbian tweens scissor each other, with a pedophile's face in between their crotches.
pedophile 1: I wish iCarly and her co-star would give me a tweenwich.

pedophile 2: I wish I could watch.

pedophile 1: You're into adults too? You fucking sickie.
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic May 31, 2011
 
19.
1. When a homosexual male flirts with another male, whether gay or straight. 2. The request of or insinuation of anal sex.
EXAMPLE 1
some dude: I totally got a fudge nudge from our gym teacher, Mr. Cumguzzler.

other dude: Yeah he hides his boner under his clipboard, while watching us change in the locker room.

EXAMPLE 2

some chick: Stab my brown eye with your Betty Crocker Fuck Musle!

some guy: Nice fudge nudge, honey!
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic December 09, 2010
 
20.
noun, misnomer: A national family oriented celebration beginning on New Year's Eve (Last night of the old year.) and ending by 12:30 am New Year's Day (First morning of the new year.), in cities and towns across the US. Created by social conservatives as a drug free, alcohol free and sex free alternative to human pleasure.
normal person: Excuse me sir, can you assist me?

First Nighter: Certainly. What do you need?

normal person: I need five hits of ecstasy, two Asian hookers, and a bottle of Champagne.

First Nighter: This is a family event. Check your liberal coat at the door.

normal person: I apologize for interrupting your NAMBLA rally. My bad.
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic November 22, 2010
 
21.
A snobby way of telling somebody "fuck you", simply by boasting about your personal wealth. You must be wealthy, first.
middle-class bitch: Eventhough I didn't show it in high school, I always respected you. I know I was in the in crowd, and you were just a wallflower. Now that we're older we should do lunch, some time.

new money man: I'll have to pass on that. As you can tell by the Lamborghini, I don't drive Toyota Camry's anymore.

middle-class bitch: Was that a Luxury Fuck You?

new money man: Fucking A right it was.
by Cunty Fresh Fanatic May 31, 2011