American Football is the act of trying to touch other men while running around in tights. For some reason it is called football (it is not played with the foot), but thats just because we're stupid americans. Football requires no stamina because individual plays last up to a grueling 15 seconds. Football players are people who just want to try to be bi-curious by taking showers with each other, and slapping each others asses. Most americans are obsessed with this sport, and on game days, resort to drunken blabbering and screaming random things. All around, the only good part of football is the super bowl half time show.