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10 definitions by Chumbucket

 
1.
1) (n) An American Thanksgiving holiday culinary grotesque: Consists of a chicken, stuffed into a duck, progressively stuffed into a turkey and baked. Provides hours of entertainment in the form of waiting for the sucker to finish cooking and enough sandwich meat to last through The Apocalypse.

2) (n) Any obese human that will set upon a buffet like a plague of locusts, stripping said buffet of all edible material, leaving only the garnish, the decorative toothpicks, and the sweaty cheese cubes from earlier in the day.

3) (n) Any plan that is unnecessarily complicated or futile. Used as a simile.
1) "Time for the Cowboys/Redskins game, is the turducken done yet?"

2) "Uh oh, better hit the foodline before turducken over there strips that bitch."

3) Jeff: "I'll be swapping out this small-block, V8 for an straight six."
Dale: "Baking up a turducken are we?"
Jeff: "What?"
Dale: "Sounds like fun."
by Chumbucket October 31, 2006
152 37
 
2.
1) A lanyard (or leash if you prefer) applied to something you wish to keep on your person while you perform acts which may result in said object's irrevocable loss.

Ex: Tying a length of paracord to your fishing knife so if you drop it, it won't plunge to the bottom of the ocean, thereby leaving you to cut that salt encrusted bowline with your teeth.

2) The act of applying such a lanyard to your equipment.
1) "Ya got some dummy cord? I don't want to lose my compass when we jump."

2) "Dummy cord that radio for me so we don't lose it when we hit the surf zone."
by Chumbucket November 02, 2006
16 3
 
3.
1) An imaginary product that miraculously stops your computer from crashing, freezing, loading plugins you don't want, or otherwise behaving in a manner that would cause even Gandhi to reach for a bat.

2) An amusing way to open a conversation with the person in the next cubicle, as you declare your computer isn't performing and you're going for coffee.
1) "Damn, I got the blue screen of death. Anyone have any Suck B Gon®?"

2) Bob: "Sheeeit. And I'm all out of Suck B Gon®. Guess it's time for some coffee, you up for it?"
Neil: "Sure, why not."
by Chumbucket November 01, 2006
13 6
 
4.
Yuppies, and their less educated brethren, who attempt to look "hip," "hot," and/or "with it" by drinking Zima which is supposed to be a trendy alcoholic beverage with the flavor of a wine cooler and the kick of a beer. For those who can't handle either.
I couldn't get a picher last night since the place was packed with the zima crowd still sporting their softball uniforms, along with the accompanying dirt and aroma.
by Chumbucket October 24, 2006
7 1
 
5.
1) (n) An unguided bomb fitted with vanes at the aft end to retard (slow) its rate of descent. Designed to be dropped from low altitudes, the vanes (air brakes) allow the delivery aircraft to egress without being struck by fragments from it's own ordnance upon detonation.

2) (v) Leaving an unsavory traveling companion someplace other than your intended destination.

3) (n) A poorly told, or otherwise untenable, joke which, once told, lays there like an unexploded bomb while the jokester prays someone can come along to defuse the situation.
1) The F4U screamed across the treetops and dropped a stick of retarded bombs on the SAM site, much to the SAM crew's displeasure.

2) "Larry was whining again so I retarded bombed the bus stop on my way here."

3) Joker: "... and the guy says 'that's not my dog.'"
Crickets: "chirp"
Joker: "Tough crowd."
by Chumbucket October 25, 2006
7 2
 
6.
1) (n) A military term. The business end of a firing range. Where all the ordnance fired, lobbed, dropped or planted does it's work. Basically every millimeter forward of the firing line. Typically contains unexploded ordnance and as such is not such a good place for a hike or picnic.

2) (n) A zone of approximately 3 feet by 5 feet in front of your boss or manager's desk.

3) (n) Anywhere in which interaction with certain people can be detrimental to your health or career.
1) The Lieutenant couldn't figure out the map again, so we ended up humping through the impact area behind the mortar range.

2) "The boss called me into the impact area today to tell me our department needs to boost throughput and reduce time to market."

3) I got off the freeway at Crenshaw and had to drive through the impact area to find a gas station.
by Chumbucket October 26, 2006
4 2
 
7.
1. An archaic term (preceeded by a number) to indicate the amount of beer one would need to consume prior to engaging in an carnal relationship with a given target.

The term is derived from the number of Budweisers (Buds) needed to overlook any obvious physical deficiencies.

2. Justification of self-induced beer-goggling.
1. Mr. White: Check her out man.
Mr. Blue: Nah. She's about a 6 on the Bud scale.

2. Mr. White: She looking a bit rugged
Mr. Blue: Ten says she's only a 3 on the Bud scale.
by Chumbucket June 14, 2006
4 2