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4 definitions by Captain Shocker

 
1.
A sarcastic way of referring to some one who has had an incredible run of good fortune. Inspired by Will Ferrell's turn of the phrase in the movie "Anchorman".
Darrin's kind of a big deal. He ran into Shaq last week and had his picture taken with him, he won the all expenses paid trip to the Indy 500 and today Medicare approved his hoveround. I wish some of that luck would come my way.
by Captain Shocker April 04, 2011
 
2.
Used to describe someone who is in the habit of finding ways to avoid doing their job. They tend to use such tactics as extended bathroom breaks, pretending to be deep in thought reading something while they are actually texting on their phone or taking extended lunches. The name is derived from the Wilford Brimley malaprop "diabeetis" since the folks this term apply to tend to be moribdly obese as well as morbidly lazy.
Did you see Mitch beetising off again? It sounded like the fuckin' NYC Fourth of July fireworks finale in the bathroom but that was over a half hour ago. I suppose it is pretty useless, though. Even if he were here, he'd be hunched over his desk IM'ing his boy toy all day and yelling at everyone who asked him for help.
by Captain Shocker November 17, 2011
 
3.
Slang term for a streetwalker in the Waterloo/Arlington area of Akron, Ohio. The nickname spread after a local fast food restaurant advertised a $1 chocolate turnover on their signage. One in particular, a reportedly transgendered person known as Darrina, patrols the area on her red hoveround mobility device.
Gunther had one of those dollar chocolate turnovers from in front of Arby's last night. He's lucky she didn't roll his ass and take his rental car.
by Captain Shocker February 08, 2011
 
4.
A term used to describe writing loaded with misspelllings, transposed letters and misspaced words (i.e. suppose dto) where any attempt to read it, as written, aloud sounds like the Swedish Chef.
Marty must have really intimidated him, he completely Borked that ticket he sent to local support.
by Captain Shocker March 14, 2011