4 definitions by Captain Rummidew

Top Definition
The act of cutting one's palm and giving their male partner a hand job, using the blood as lube.
Dude! You know that goth chick we met last night? Well after the party, we went out back, and she totally fucking cut her palm open! Then she grabbed my dick and gave me a good ol' fashion Cutter's Handjob .
by Captain Rummidew June 08, 2010

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The sexual act of bending over, pulling your testicles between your legs, and having your partner lick both your anus and swollen red testicles; which now resemble tomatoes.
Cole: So how was your date with Valerie last night?

Stephen: The whore took me back to her place and made me a tomato salad. So all in all, worth it.
by Captain Rummidew June 10, 2010

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The state a penis exists in when it has not quite reached a full erection. In this state, we must rule the penis is both flaccid and firm.
I must say, that average looking girl over there has rendered me with Schrodinger's Cock.
by Captain Rummidew December 08, 2011

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Declaring yourself the winner in the middle of a petty, nonsensical argument by stating, "I win". By doing this, you are officially the winner of the argument in question. This rule is named after Christopher Columbus, who declared that he discovered a country he did not in fact discover, but still receives the credit for doing so.
Cole: What are you talking about? Just because I'm black doesn't mean I love fried chicken!

Stephen: Yes it does. I win.

Cole: What?! You can't do that!

Stephen: Yes I can. Columbus rule. Suck it.
by Captain Rummidew June 10, 2010

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