To say something that will shut someone up who’s being catty.
“If that receptionist says one damn thing about my hair, I will declaw her ass so fast.”
"If she starts getting catty, just say something about her husband leaving her for another woman. That'll declaw her in a second."
Someone who sends in post cards to Post Secret about things that everyone already knows or who brags about their secret being picked.
Josh was a Post Secret poser and would send in post cards every week about the time he pissed his pants at prom. Like no one would figure that one out.
"Tony, don’t be such a Post Secret poser. If you’re going to send in secrets shut up about it."
Someone who gets as much of their clothing, furnishings, books, cds, dvds, etc. from sale racks and bargain bins
Sara the Bargain Bin Bandit somehow managed to look like amazing even though her entire ensemble cost just $30.
Someone who spends all their money on ugly, shitty jewelry and insists on wearing as much of it as possible.
April hated her jewelry junky roommate. You could hear the banging and clicking of her ugly necklaces, bracelets, anklets, and rings every time she moved around the house.
Annie was a pathetic jewelry junky. She’d parade around the office in 10 cheap gold chains and bracelets up to her elbows.
A piece of furniture or person that is infected with scabies.
“Dude, you gonna help me move up that couch we found out by the dumpster?”
“Nah, that looks like it’s a scabies sanctuary.”
Tara thought that sweet almost chair from the second hand store was a steal. Too bad for her, it was a scabies sanctuary.
Someone who spends all their time watching DIY shows, going to DIY websites, and reading DIY books but never actually does any DIY projects to completion.
Maggie’s roommate Sophia is a real DIY Dilettante. She’s got at least three dozen half finished projects lying around their apartment and she still hasn’t finished replacing the faucet in the 2nd bathroom.
"Honey, you need to face facts. You're a DIY Dilettante and you need to finish at least one of these projects. I mean, how hard is it to finish painting the living room wall?"
When someone makes a romantic or sexual move on someone’s ex just after a breakup.
Jack made a serious leftover lunge when he asked his roommate’s ex out just two days after they broke up.
We were taking bets about when Betty was going to ask him out. She’s notorious for making one really pathetic leftover lunge after another within hours of someone's breakup.