9 definitions by Biff Justice

A girl, either ugly, fat, or unpopular, that believes she is a splitting image of Jessica Simpson. Most usually, this girl has a very warped mind about the world, women in general, and mainly herself. She is led to believe due to this disorder that since she is so much like Jessica Simpson, she should be treated as such. If in any case you fail to treat her this way, with all her power, she will attempt to make you conform.
Many believe Jessica Simpson disorder to be related with heavy MTV viewing, cheese intake, and a long/drawn-out menstrual cycle, lasting an entire year. The only known cure is immediate psychiatric treatment. Removal from MTV/Cheese will combat some of the symptoms, but relapse is common.
Currently, 1% of the female population has this disorder, with 10% of those afflicted residing in Wisconsin.
"Dude, just fucking dump Heather already, nobody likes her. She is manipulating you with her Jessica Simpson Disorder."
"I thought the tv remote had a lot cheese powder on it."
"You better wash those hands, she'll lick 'em clean to the bone."
by Biff Justice November 02, 2005
Changing the order of words in a sentence as the Jedi Yoda from Star Wars would. It makes the sentences a drunk person speaks funnier and very laughable.
Dam that cats funny, he yoda-talks like no one else I know!

"Read the dirty magazines you will."
"Rubbed one out you have?"
"Young one failed, you have not"
by Biff Justice October 19, 2005
1. noun. The term used to describe a pack of cigarettes containing many different brands of cigarettes. The pack, through trading or mixing, has at least 3 different kinds of cigarettes, allowing the owner many choices.
"Can I bum a grit off you?"
"Sure, I got 3 Camel Lights, 1 Marb Red, 2 Winstons, 1 Virginia slim, a Camel Strait, 5 Parliaments, and 3 USA Golds. Which one?"
"I'll take the Slim, and that's one hell of a variety pack you got there."
by Biff Justice March 10, 2006
A person who constantly drifts off to places unknown, within the realm of their own mind. Usually, this person has A.D.D. or another disorder that renders them unable to pay attention.
"Hey, hey, in down front fat guy." No point in trying anymore to reach that minderer, he was off to places unknown.
by Biff Justice October 19, 2005
1. A resident of the state of Illinois, that drives.
2. All of the Illinois residents are horrible drivers. Turn signals??? What the fuck are those for!?! Ahh, gas and brake, that's all they need. Car life expectancy in Illinois, 3 years (if it doesn't get in an accident).
"I fucking hate Chicago, chok full of Illinosions"
"Me to man, me too."
by Biff Justice November 02, 2005
Is a small to unusually large piece of driftwood that, when high, a stoner will consistently cast at and continue to lose fishing lures on.
Holy shit guys, check out that awesome dagwood. There's gotta be 50 fishing lines stuck to it!
by Biff Justice October 19, 2005
A plan instituted by all the branches of the US government. This plan when used effectively can stop a suspected terrorist member from renting books from the public library on how to build bombs, chemical weapons, organize a militia, etc.
Democrats naturally hate this plan since it was created by the Republican party in wake of 9/11. If it was the other way around, Republicans would hate it since the Democrats came up with it.
Rightfully so, this Act should save some lives. Proof you ask for? Nope, how can you prove it's working? Then again, you also can't prove that the Patriot Act isn't working...
"Man Joe, I hate the fucking Patriot Act"
"Ok Al' Jaiera, you're only saying that cause your dad and you tried to build a bomb but the library wouldn't let your towel heads check out the book."
"Oh yeah, now I see how George W. Bush and The Patriot Act are saving lives Joe"
"You're such a terrorist Al' Jaiera, and a sand nigger to boot!"
"I know...."
by Biff Justice November 10, 2005

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