16 definitions by Bernard Bangwanger

Top Definition
A women fakes an orgasm, then tells her partner "Yeah, that was great."
After very efficient lovemaking, she told me I did a good job, but I could feel her sargasm as she was laying it on pretty thick.
by Bernard Bangwanger December 21, 2010

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to delay time by pleasuring yourself.
Due to my night of procrasturbation, I didn't finish that spreadsheet
by Bernard Bangwanger April 15, 2010

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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1. A large women who likes to be ejaculated on.
2. A large whale who likes to be ejaculated on.
Pete: Why did you go home with that large women?
Mully: Dude, she is a sperm whale.
Pete: Oh. Then kudos to you.
by Bernard Bangwanger September 24, 2011

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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When you vomit in your mouth and re-swallow the taco bell fourthmeal you just devoured.
John's fifthmeal did not go down as easily as his fourthmeal.
by Bernard Bangwanger January 09, 2011

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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to spend hours on the toilet pondering life
I had a gallon of cheese dip so I spent the rest of the evening in constiplation that great men crap alike.
by Bernard Bangwanger June 11, 2010

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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1. When you first start to pleasure yourself and you can't decide which person you're going to think about during climax.
2. When a girl is at a sex toy shop and she can't decide which toy to buy.
Steve spends a long time masturdebating since he has such a large spank-bank.
Liz spent hours masturdebating over the wall of toys.
by Bernard Bangwanger December 29, 2010

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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A term to describe consuming 160oz of beer. If you are drinking 32oz beers, the 5th one would make a bakers gallon.
After Boaz drank a bakers gallon of beer, he got another lap dance.
by Bernard Bangwanger November 06, 2004

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt