Colloquial British Slang for a Penis.
Origins lie in the popular myth, that every time you masturbate, a Kitten dies.
Yo, Frinton, If your Wrongcock Brother gets his Kitten Hammer out anywhere near my Sister again, I'm going to cut the fucker off, and feed it to my Pitbulls, Ok?
A Joke that you don't get straight away. Two or three seconds is an ideal Fuse length.
Me "What's the best thing about having sex, with twenty eight year old partners?"
Me "There are twenty of them."
You "..................................."Jokebomb, You horrible cunt!"
A Salty, tangy beverage, drunk by sea-bent mariners, on long voyages.
"Adrift upon a glassy sea, no wind upon our sail,
we pulled the boatswains trousers down,
and drank his "sailors ale"
A young lady who responds to a gentlemans attempts to get into her knickers with monosyllabic disinterest.
A Single Word Answer Bitch.
"She looks well fit, but I tried chatting her up, and she's a right SWAB!"
someone who is particularly stupid or dense.
He must be a right "two cocks" because you don't get that stupid sat at home playing with just one!
A Slop Dodger is a Lady, who for reasons unknown, prefers not to get her face and hair bespunkled during the course of fellatio.
"I know she's a little past her sell by date, , but her toothless condition makes her the most popular Slop Dodger on the Block".
Descriptive of the brambly jungle of snatch thatch
, that certain types of Ladies prefer to sport, in the bikini region. Particularly
if they are of the "Dungarees and Birkenstock" persuasion. Much favoured by 1980's Greenham Common traditionalists, and the stereotypical "Bulldyke" variety of Lezza, they often smelled of "Scampi Fries" or Fanny flavoured NikNaks.
Todays hygiene obsessed young Ladies, with their penchent for topiary, and waxing, are unfamiliar with the "Bigmuffs
" of the 1970's and 80's, and quite frankly, I would jump out of my skin if confronted unexpectedly with one "Au Naturel" as it were. I'd be looking around for something to kill it with, before I was relaxed enough to confront a big hairy growler
like that. **Shudders**
This is the tale, of Bertha Boot,
who bought a brand new bathing suit,
When she goes swimming in the water,
You see things you didn't oughta,
May Day morning, Whitby Bay,
her nipples stood out, plain as day!
But down below, the view is best,
Her Chuff is like a Yeti's Chest!