32 definitions by (i am) john doe

A denizen who frequents the Web site Daily Kos, known for it left-wing activism and its irascible Webmaster Markos Moulitsas Zuniga. Kossacks deride conservative blogs as "hate sites" because of the frank and unapologetic assessment of Islam frequently expressed by commentators.

Conservatives regard Kossacks as among the leading proponents of "leftist fascism," characterized by bullying, dirty tricks, illogical discussions, and an irrational hatred of everything to the right of Noam Chomsky.

The name "Kossack" references the Cossacks, an old spelling of the ethnic group now known as Kazaks. When Russia absorbed Kazakstan into its empire, the Czar used Muslim Kazaks as a special cavalry due to their expert horsemanship and reputation for savage violence. Cossacks often were the perpetrators of horrific pogroms against Jews in Russian territory during the Czarist era.
Tax Payer #1 "Did you hear what those asshat Kossacks are up to again? They are so self-deluded with the idea that they are 'making a difference.'"

Tax Payer #2 "Like I always say, 'don't drink the bong water.'"
by (I am) John Doe May 05, 2007

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A contraction of the phrase "monkey see, monkey do."

A muckadoo is often known by other names such as a liberal, a leftist, or a @#$% idiot. It is a creature that uses odd and illogical behaviors and speech patterns that it copied (sometimes with small variances) from another creature - usually another muckadoo.

They are located throughout the fifty states, though are rarer in some areas while extremely common in others. They tend to infest college campuses and often can be found online at such sites as Democratic Underground and commenting at Daily Kos.
MUCKADOO FAQ

Q. Can muckadoos be dangerous?

A. Easily startled, a muckadoo is rarely of any danger. Because of the shrill sounds they make and their pungent odors, they are classified simply as a nuisance.

Q. These muckadoos are all saying the same things. Are they really different muckadoos, or one posting under multiple names?

A. They are different muckadoos. What you have encountered is the mimicking behavior essential to a muckadoo. When a muckadoo sees something another muckadoo does or says, that appears "clever" or entertaining to the muckadoo, it will repeat said behavior now thinking itself to be "clever" (though the repeated behavior often has no real meaning when analyzed). This mimicry of muckadoos makes it hard to distinguish them from each other, but being so involved with muckadoos as to need to be able to tell them apart is discouraged.

Q. I see a large gathering of muckadoos yelling and waving signs. What is this?

A. Sometimes an alpha muckadoo will organize other muckadoos into a pack that meets at a specific place. Then when this pack of muckadoos encounters certain stimuli (usually T.V. cameras), they will begin to make noise and display their colorful signs. This phenomenon is called a "protest."

Q. What are they protesting?

A. Nothing. The name "protest" is a bit misleading as these muckadoo gatherings have nothing to do with protesting anything specific. Apparently, muckadoos gain great pleasure from making noise and waving signs, especially if given attention.

Q. I noticed the muckadoo has a strong, foul smell. Is this usual?

A. Yes. It's their main natural defense. If it becomes too much of a problem, try spraying the muckadoo with a hose.

Q. I sprayed the muckadoo with a hose, and he called me a "fascist." What does that mean?

A. Like many of the muckadoos utterances, it was something that once had a meaning, but such meaning is now lost. "Fascist" is simply a meaningless epithet used by a muckadoo to show displeasure with a person.

Q. Should we ever be concerned with the actions of muckadoos?

A. Though shrill and often seen on T.V., they are considered revolting by most Americans and have little effect on the country at large. Instead, they are a constant but harmless nuisance. To keep them from bothering your household, simply put out an American flag. Its bright colors tend to scare away muckadoos (though don't question their patriotism).
by (I am) John Doe March 07, 2008

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In blog terminology, to glare with silent disapproval at a troll who has intentionally attempted to derail a topic.

A sign of non-acknowledgment of a particularly offensive or inflammatory post, and a sign to other commenters not to “feed the troll” (pay attention to a disruptive commenter). Usually written all capitals.
Post #1 (Patriot) "Socialism is a fatally flawed ideology that has utterly failed the people it purported to help."

Post #2 (troll) "Well of course it did to a racist, sexist, bigot, homophobe like you. You and the other Chimpy McBushhitlerites probably want to grind up the lazy ass poor people and turn them into dog food! My food doesn't have parents. Meat is murder!

Likewise some workaholics are obscenely rich and it's not fair. The money that they stole from the native Americans should be taken away and given to the lazy ass poor people (so that they can become lazy ass middle class people). And what about WMDs and global climate change? What about that huh?

Mean people suck, and I hope you eat a lot of fast food and die of a heart attack. Fascist bastards."

Post #3 (Patriot) GAZE
by (I am) John Doe February 08, 2008

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Sacrastic and pessimistic name for Europe, based on the observation that Muslim immigration and population growth — coupled with European appeasement of Muslim cultural demands — will eventually lead the continent to become an Islamic Caliphate.

Popularized by writer B’at Yeor in her 2005 book Eurabia: The Euro-Arab Axis.
Failed Socialist policies and a climate of accomodation have transformed Europe into Eurabia.

It was chilling when an icon like Brigitte Bardot was prosecuted and fined for expressing her politically incorrect opinions. I was glad not to live in Frogistan (then I remembered that the PC Thought Police are trying to limit free expression in America too).
by (I am) John Doe March 19, 2008

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A denizen of "The Huffington Post" blog: "One who breathes in the rarified, oxygen-starved air of 'The Huffington Post'."
"Hi, I'm E. Feet Liberal and I care about important things. That's why I rely on 'The Huffington Post' to keep me up to date with:

--politically incorrect words/ideas that have been newly banned by the intellectually enlightened

--inane progressive ideology

--the latest DNC talking points

--cheap shots aimed at anyone and anything to the right of Noam Chomsky

and

glowing reports about how President Obama is so totally awesome!

When common sense and reality threaten to burst my rose colored, progressive bubble, I gain solace from being a Huffer. Reading the anti-American opinions, half-truths and cherry-picked facts reassures me that my hysterical hand wringing, misplaced activism, and blogging about the same, is a wise life's devotion.

Amazingly though, there are people who post disagreements with my utopian worldview. They have humbly suggested that my advocacy has no lasting spiritual value--that it's all just wood, hay and stubble. Can you imagine that? For Pete's sake, I'm trying to save the planet from the evils of free market economics!

Don't worry though, during these comment exchanges I call upon my academic background, and 'rhetorical kung-fu' skills, to provide a reasoned and enlightened response. First, I stereotype the dissenters as 'typical conservative, racist, sexist, bigot, Freeper, Zionist, homophobe, inbred, Fox News, wing nut, hate mongers.'

Then, building on that foundation, I am able to summarily dismiss everything that the dissenters have to say because (obviously) anyone who holds a differing opinion from a Huffer is mentally ill. (Too bad Amerika doesn't have those wonderful psychiatric hospitals and re-education camps like China and Russia. I used to love going to camp).

If the unenlightened still refuse to conform to my point of view, or try to cloud the issue with FACTS, I appeal to my fellow libtard posters for backup. Via a democratic consensus, the enlightened among us organize into a grassroots cybermob and bully the dissenters with every ad hominem available (so be forewarned you inbred, fascist scum)!

Obviously this kind of reaction is a responsible use of power, and we Huffers make a difference every day in the all important blogosphere. (Because mean people suck, and their free expression is not welcomed on the World Wide Web).

As a Huffer, I am continually working to create a better world. Will you help me in my efforts to quash wrong speech, wrong thoughts, wrong ideology, wrong curriculum, wrong rights and wrong freedoms? (The Bill of Rights is so problematic at times and should be disallowed in red states because it is an obstacle to socially responsible progress).

(Takes bong hit)

Power to the people baby!"
by (I am) John Doe May 13, 2009

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Derisive name for Canada, reflecting its anti-American sentiment. Coined by Pat Buchanan on October 31, 2002.
In their quest for a worldwide Caliphate, Islamofascists are using Canuckistan as a staging area for future attacks on America.

With friends like Canuckistan, who needs enemies?
by (I am) John Doe March 19, 2008

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Stupid Intifada — a commentary on the futility and ultimate pointlessness of the Palestinian Intifada.
The Palestinians activated the "Law of Unintended Consequences" when they started their second stupidfada. For some inexplicable reason, the Israelis chose to build a wall in order to keep sociopathic, islamof--ktard people from blowing up the country.
by (I am) John Doe February 01, 2008

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