JMP is an abbreviation for Jizz My Pants. This verb is used to describe something that would make you J your P. Similar JIMP or CMP
Bob: "You see that blonde with the huge tits and thong."
Jim: "Yeah, she makes me want to JMP."
Bob: "o shit, do you have a spare pair of boxers?"
When a man is fucking a midget, any style, and preforms a stunt on her that is shown in Jackass, whether that be a cum chug, an ass brand...etc.
Jim: "Hey, How'd it go with Charlene last night."
Bob: "It was great! we were doing doggy style, and since she's a midget I thought I would pull Wee Man's Revenge."
Jim: "Nice. What stunt did u do?"
Bob: "I branded a dick on her ass"
Jim: "Dude... weak."
The act of moving your car when you're stuck in traffic or at a red light and your radio goes fuzzy. In this act, one moves their car an inch in order to fix the fuzzy radio.
This can also have the opposite effect just making the radio worse.
Rob: "Ahh shit the radios fuzzy."
Jim:"It's aight, ill just move a Radio Inch"
The condition of having techtism or the state of being technologically impared. Similar to Techtarded
Bob: "I tried plugging that machine into my computer in order to add songs but it didn't work.."
Jim: "Bob, thats a toaster. You really are Techtistic"
The act of skeeting and pissing in a towel then slapping someone with it, usually your sexual partner.
Becky: "Last night Jim Shamwowed me so hard i can still taste his piss."
When a man is fucking a woman in the ass and suddenly scalps her saying: "Welcome to your nightmare", and then continues to cum in her open scalp.
When you do this, remember to dispose of the body!
Jim: "Hey how was it with Melissa last night."
Bob: "Awesome, I was giving it to her in the butt when i decided to give her the old Freddy Krueger."
Jim: "Dude, that is actually demented."
Bob: "Don't worry Jim, I disposed of the body."